Beer Company Bets That Young Canadians Will Prefer Weed Over Beer

Earlier this year, I received an unsolicited message from an old high school friend whom I hadn’t spoken to in a decade, completely out of the blue, asking me what would be a hot ‘weed’ stock to buy. I assumed that he was probably smoking that stuff at the time he sent me that message, but after a little chitchat I learned that he was indeed serious. This guy was asking me for the tickers of weed-related penny stocks. Not of one particular company, but ANY company that sold weed and was listed on the venture exchange. His reasoning, in true amateur fashion, was that ‘pot’ was going to be legalized and therefore owning these stocks beforehand was going to make him a fortune. I cordially explained to him that penny stocks are worth pennies for a reason and that real gentlemen ‘don’t invest in that shit’, prior to kindly and gracefully telling him to ‘fuck off’.

And now this happens.

Constellation Brands, owner of multiple well-known and respected alcoholic brands including Corona and Modelo, has agreed to purchase 10% of some publicly traded cannabis company for the purpose of selling MARIJUANA JUICE to the Canadian public. ‘Research‘ has shown that Canadians love their weed, and they love it increasingly more than beer. As a matter of fact, they love it so much they want to drink that shit, just for the god damn cannabis flavor. What the fuck is going on?

I suppose there is some truth to that story. If one were to ask around, I would say a large amount of Canadian high schoolers use the drug on a regular basis, of which a frightening amount of them are actually selling it. The drug has gotten so mainstream, so commonplace, that anyone can get hold of it anywhere. It is truly sickening to see a culture where a drug is placed on a pedestal and praised, endorsed by public figures and proliferated by secondary students. Where I live, you end up in a bacteria infested gaol for simply being in possession, no questions asked. It would be irrational for a company to even think of making a cannabis denominated product line, let alone actually do it.

Anyways, its 12 midnight here on a Sunday night, and I have no business getting worked out about some pothead misfits half way across the world.